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My name is Tamsin and I’m a Life Coach – a.k.a The Parenthood Coach – and a Mum of two loveable, hectic little humans who are five and three.
Tell us a bit about your job. Why do you do what you do?
I LOVE my job as a Life Coach and spend my days supporting unfulfilled and overwhelmed Mums who are stuck in a professional rut, empowering them to create a life filled with confidence, balance, direction and purpose.
I’m so passionate about my work because I used to be one of the women that I’m now on a mission to support. I had a longstanding career in marketing and events, and after having kids that career stopped making sense for me. I felt stuck and disillusioned and had a sense that I’d lost myself somehow since becoming a Mum.
My story has a happy ending – I retrained as a Life Coach and set up my own business. And while life is still a juggle in lots of ways (that’s Mum Life, right?) I have definitely redressed the balance. And I’m now dedicated to creating that same transformation for other amazing Mums, who are ready to fulfil their potential.
What does 'Self-care' mean to you?
For me, self-care is a way of showing up for myself and saying to myself ‘I matter’. As a Mum it’s not uncommon to fly through life at a million miles an hour, juggling all the balls and tending to everyone else’s needs. We can too easily forget about our own needs, which makes it so much harder to show up as our best selves. So, for me self-care is about making myself a priority, every single day, so I can fulfil my potential and nurture my own self-worth.
What impact does self-care have on your life as a mum?
Giving attention to my own self-care enables me to show up as a better version of myself, for me and my kids. When my self-care needs aren’t met I can really feel my own metaphorical ‘batteries’ start to lose their charge and effectiveness. I become grumpy, impatient and unproductive, and my ability to be present with my kids definitely takes a hit. For me, self-care is helps me to recharge, rejuvenate and reconnect with myself. It puts me in a good mood, feeds me energy and enhances my creativity. I also far better equipped to handle the intensity of Mum-life.
What does self-care look like in practical terms for you?
I don’t have a set self-care routine, but I do have a bank of my favourite self-care practices that I draw on in some form on a daily basis. Some days I have time to combine a bunch of them, while other days I only have 10 minutes to do one small thing.
But whatever happens, I make a commitment to do at least one thing for myself each day, because I know what a positive impact it has on my wellbeing. Something quick and simple is going to be way more beneficial than doing nothing at all.
I LOVE yoga and try to attend a weekly class in person, but I also have a few short 10-minute yoga routines that really get me energised and in flow first thing in the morning that are easy to squeeze in.
I’m a big fan of practicing mindfulness and journaling, both of which I dip in and out of throughout the week. But a calm stroll listening to a podcast, a peaceful cup of tea sitting in the garden or lying on my bed and just breathing deeply all class as self-care in my book.
Self-care doesn’t have to be expensive, time-consuming or over-engineered. Simple self-care is often the most nurturing.
I try to be realistic and low pressured with myself when it comes to scheduling in self-care because as a busy Mum and business owner, I know that life can change on an hour to hour basis!
The aim of the self-care game is for it to bring me joy, calm and nourishment, so the moment it starts to feel stressful or challenging I know it’s time to take a breath and regroup with myself!
How (if at all) has this changed since you became a mum?
Since becoming a Mum, I now place so much more importance on self-care. Pre-kids I used to take it for granted and it was something I could easily pick up and fit in whenever I wanted.
But after kids, self-care regularly ended up as the last thing on my to-do list and making time for it felt like Mission Impossible, which is when I really noticed it missing from my life.
Factoring self-care into my life as a Mum now happens much more intentionally, but my appreciation for those moments of self-love has increased exponentially as a result.
How do you make self-care happen? How do you fit it into your busy life as a
mum?
As parents it’s often challenging to find quality time for ourselves, but even the busiest of us can squeeze it in if we really try. I’ve found that the key is to create a mindset shift from ‘I have no time’ to ‘I can find time’.
I regularly check in with myself to consider how I’m spending my time, as it’s often possible to identify pockets of ‘me time’ in disguise. I realised, for example, that I would wake up in the morning and lie in bed scrolling social media until the kids woke up. So now as soon as I wake up, I get up and use that time to do something for myself in a peaceful house. It’s such a positive way to start my day, and the more I’ve committed to that habit and felt the benefits, the more ingrained it has become in my day to day life.
Other things that really help me include locking the time in my diary as if it were a doctor’s appointment, not being afraid to ask friends or family to help with the kids, and not feeling guilty for letting my kids watch some TV so that I can grab some ‘me time’. Realising that I can practice self-care even when the kids are around has been a game-changer for me!
What is your top tip for mums struggling to make time for themselves right now?
My top tip is to make self-care choices that appeal to you, because if you feel motivated and enthused to practice self-care, you’re more likely to make time for it. If it feels like a chore, you’re more likely to resist it! If you channel joy and pleasure into your self-care routine and remove pressure and expectation from the equation, it will represent a positive and nourishing force in your life rather than another ‘to do’ on your list.
Another tip is to take a moment to acknowledge how it feels when you DO make time to practice self-care. We often rush through life, always looking to the next thing, meaning that the positive benefits of certain actions can pass us by. So, the next time you practice self-care, take a minute to tune into how it feels and what you have gained from prioritising yourself. Bank those feel-good vibes and use them to remind yourself why it’s worth doing. As it may make it easier to motivate yourself next time.
Tamsin Williamson – The Parenthood Coach
Facebook: @theparenthoodcoach
Instagram: @theparenthoodcoach
Tamsin hosts a free Facebook Group called The Parenthood Retreat – a space for Mums to step away from the whirlwind of parenthood, pause the Mum Juggle and put the spotlight on their needs, wellbeing, passions and aspirations:
Download Tamsin's Free Guide: 8 Ways To Bag 30 Minutes of Daily Headspace, Minus The Mum Guilt.
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